Everyone’s doing it and having a great time. How do we know? We see it everywhere…advertisements, tv, movies, books. It looks so enticing and it’s almost expected. You’re considered prudish if you don’t. What’s the big deal? Why wait? Why is it important to save sex for marriage?
There is a sense in which sexual sins are different from all others. In sexual sin we violate the sacredness of our own bodies, these bodies that were made for God-given and God-modeled love, for “becoming one” with another. ~1 Corinthians 6:18, The Message
Because we belong to the day, we must live decent lives for all to see. Don’t participate in the darkness of wild parties and drunkenness, or in sexual promiscuity and immoral living, or in quarreling and jealousy. Instead, clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ. And don’t let yourself think about ways to indulge your evil desires. ~Romans 13:13-14, NLT
In her book The Bare Naked Truth: Dating, Waiting, and God’s Purity Plan, Bekah Hamrick Martin explores why abstinence is so important. Peppered with funny anecodotes, personal testimonies, and quizzes, this book is a must read for girls and parents of girls who are ready to start dating. It might not be a bad idea for unmarried adults as well, although they’re not the intended audience.
The most important take home message is that you must have a plan. You must decide before you start dating where your boundaries are. You can’t wait until the heat of the moment to determine what is too far.
I wish I had The Bare Naked Truth when I was a teen. I’m not one for blind obedience, which is both good and bad trait of mine. It’s good when it comes to man-made rules. Remember the Nazis? Let’s make sure that what we do upholds God’s righteousness and love for humanity. But it’s bad when it comes to God’s commands. With Him, you follow and pray for enlightenment later because He knows more than we can know and He doesn’t owe us an explanation.
As a teen, it didn’t make sense to me why waiting for marriage was so important. If you protected yourself against STD’s and pregnancy, and if you were with someone you loved and might marry, why wait? It just didn’t make sense to me. But the truth is, sexual intimacy is more than just physiology, it’s emotional bonding meant to connect two people. Sex before marriage has emotional consequences that aren’t apparent and can have life-long consequences. God tries to protect us by warning us to wait (3 times in the Song of Songs). Some of these consequences are revealed through personal testimonies in The Bare Naked Truth. Things I never considered.
But be careful. There is adult content in this book that isn’t for the young. There were topics in the book that surprised me; for instance, the extent to which some young women struggle with addiction to pornography and masturbation.
And, of course, reading about sex makes you think about sex and we know where that leads. So be careful, my friends…
Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem, by the gazelles, yes, by all the wild deer: Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe-and you’re ready. ~ Song of Songs 2:7
Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem, by the gazelles, yes, by all the wild deer: Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe-and you’re ready. ~ Song of Songs 3:5
Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem: Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe-and you’re ready. ~Song of Songs 8:4
Alright, I’m curious but I don’t want to embarrass anybody. Did you wait? Answer via the anonymous poll below and let’s see how we did.
And I’d love to hear from you! What do you think is the most important reason people should wait to be intimate before marriage? And where do you think the physical line should be drawn?